


My Little Devilbaby

by stellarbird



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-03
Updated: 2012-01-03
Packaged: 2017-10-28 19:20:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/311334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarbird/pseuds/stellarbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>TG: shut up strider las time we went drinking u passed out after two beers<br/>TT: I was sick.<br/>TG: yeah u were<br/>TG: on the babies<br/>TG: maybe thwats why my baby is so ffcuked up<br/>TG: shes got vomit-induced trauma in her brain</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Little Devilbaby

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gentleThaumaturge (roughmagic)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roughmagic/gifts).



\-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 15:52 --

TG: help me  
TG: heeellpp me  
TG: seriously this is a siorus problem im having here  
TG: *serious  
TT: It seems that you require my assistance.  
TG: wow no fuck i really dont need to deal with your autoresponger right now  
TG: send real human strider asap  
TT: You hurt my feelings, sis.  
TT: You hurt them real bad.  
TT: That was the real me. You thought I was just an automated facsimile of my real self?  
TG: stop fucking with me for real i need to talk to u  
TG: about this devil child i pcieked up from that ateroid  
TG: *atsteroid  
TG: * meteor  
TT: Ah, I see. The scourge of adulthood, parenting problems. Dear little Rose is misbehaving, then?  
TG: no that s not it  
TG: shes not misbhaeving at all  
TG: seriously its totally freazking me out  
TG: yesterfda y i tried to feed her carrot s and i accidentally all over the goddamn kitchen table  
TT: Were you drunk?  
TG: you can prove nothing  
TG: lmao yeah i was totally sozzled  
TG: but anyewa y i go to get some naptkins and a nice bottle of tequila  
TT: Tequila? How uncouth.  
TG: shut up strider las time we went drinking u passed out after two beers  
TT: I was sick.  
TG: yeah u were  
TG: on the babies  
TG: maybe thwats why my baby is so ffcuked up  
TG: shes got vomit-induceid trauma in her brain  
TG: so i get back after like i dunno twenty minutes  
TG: devilbabys sittig on a completely clean table  
TG: carrot mush covered napinns in the tash  
TG: *napkins  
TT: Are you sure this isn’t yet another tequila induced hallucination?  
TT: I remember you calling me once with hiccup-filled rants about how your baby was making you ovaltine for your hangover.  
TG: no thats real  
TT: ...  
TT: Shit, Dave can’t even form proper sentences yet.  
TT: Kid’s two and the most complicated thing he can say is “not like smile puppet.”  
TG: wanna trade  
TT: No.  
TG: haha no yeah that was a joke  
TG: i love my little devilbaby  
TG: although she scares me sometimes  
TG: shes gonna be the best fcuikin devilbaby that ever deviled  
TG: shes tryin to read my psych textbook now isn that cute  
TG: she knows shes only on a middle schol readign level  
TG: go baby go  
TG: someday when uour big and strong  
TG: you will be a king  
TT: Are you quoting The Lion King 2 at your baby?  
TT: Shit’s real deep, yo.  
TG: sthvup  
TG: *shurup  
TG: *shut up  
TG: you will be a kign little rose  
TG: lol no no one cares about kings  
TG: you will be a god

**Author's Note:**

> This was a really good prompt; I'm sorry wasn't able to do it more justice because of time reasons, but I hope you liked it!


End file.
